(Uproxx) One of my great hopes in life is that George R.R. Martin will release the next book in the series that inspired Game of Thrones, and when fans start reading, they will quickly discover that the whole thing is about a 3-on-3 basketball tournament in Westeros. My reasoning is simple: it would be hilarious. Think of the reaction. People would lose their minds.
A few preliminary notes about my methodology:
The rankings are based on things we’ve learned on the show only. I have not read the books. If you have read the books and have information that would alter the list substantially, you should consider making your own. It’s quite fun.
The rankings are not limited to characters who are still alive. We’ve got dead ones in there, too.
Living characters are ranked based on current potential ability (with one exception), and deceased characters are ranked based on potential ability at the time of their death.
10. Oberyn Martell
7. Jon Snow
6. The One Wildlings Giant
5. The Night King
4. Jaqen H’ghar
3. Jaime Lannister (pre-amputation)
1. Khal Drogo
Cool idea by ‘Brian’ over at Uproxx but there are some glaring problems with his picks. I get trust the process but My Lanta you have the Wildings Giant aka Wun Weng (you better put some respeckt on his name from henceforth!) going 6th overall and that is a tragedy. Along with having Oberyn going tenth and the ever slow moving Melisandre somehow going above him its time to get started on my list of the top 1o picks if this was the NBA draft.
1. Wun Weg Wun
You can’t teach size and Wun Weg has it in spades, 14 ft of it to be exact combined with the strength of 12 men. He is the franchise changer and a championship cornerstone that you expect from the number 1 pick spot.
2. The Night King
Second off the board is the Night King. He possesses a plethora of skills and talent like his inability to get rattled because of his icy cold demeanor and his win at all costs method. He’s a lot like Kobe Bryant so you know what you’re getting.
3. The Mountain
Going with more size since its a rare commodity in the GOT world and The Mountain fits the bill coming in tipping the scales at 6’9″ four hundred pounds. He is the fierce defensive force you crave to protect your basket. No one is gliding through the lane with him holding down the paint.
4. Jon Snow
Some may he’s too undersized to go this high but I don’t care the kid’s got game. He is a natural born leader and pair that with his quickness and his agility as seen in the above gif he slides perfectly onto any team in the lead guard position. He’s battle tested and plays with a chip on his shoulder like so many of the great ones did.
5. Khal Drogo
The last of the big men goes here because of his strength, explosiveness. He just oozes bravado and he will need that going up against the other giants in this game. Not too mention is his uncanny wingspan, he has all the tools to be a great defender.
With the game shifting towards position-less basketball Bronn is a great value pick going here. Born iscrafty, agile, mobile and hostile. He’s a jack of all trades what I’m saying and his humor is infectious among his teammates. He most closely reminds me of Draymond Green
7. Jaquen H’ghar
For all the same reasons as Bronn especially except he is not as funny so he loses a couple points in my book.
I said the last of the big men were gone but I didn’t say the last of the big women. Brienne is a skillfully trained player that can you beat you physically and mentally. She reminds of Marc Gasol , just the prototypical grit N grind player. She would make a great sidekick to a powerful duo.
9. Oberyn Martell
He may not win you a championship but Oberyn Martell will put asses in the seats and be all over Twitter the next morning with his high flying , flashy play. No one can excite or a shock a crowd more than Oberyn with his charisma. His NBA comparison would be another guy with a nickname almost as good as “The Red Viper” and that is Jason ‘White Chocolate’ Williams.
10. The Hound
Finally rounding out the top 10 is The Hound. He may be a little banged up with some injuries over the years but he’s been in rehab after his near catastrophic fall at the hands of Brienne. Since then he’s been in rehab putting in the work grinding to get back. He could really be the steal of the draft going this low and no one swings a sword or axe quite like him. He has the bloodline as well with his brother ‘The Mountain’ going earlier. He’s highly motivated and seems to have found some peace with his true purpose.